Star Wars DBZ Style
by Kami1
Summary: Darth Goku? Jedi Masters Trunks and Goten? And don't forget Master Hercule Satan and his apprentice Gohan in Star Wars DBZ style.
1. Star Wars Episode 1

Star Wars DBZ Style

When George was having the cast brought over for Star Wars Episode 1, the cast was killed by a stray energy blast from Trunks, so naturally the Z fighters are being forced to take their places.

Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars, Dragonball Z, or much else.

Episode1

Cast:

Yoda: Goten  
Mace Windu: Trunks  
Anakin: Vegeta  
Qui Gon Jinn: Mr. Satan  
Obi-Wan Kenobi: Gohan  
Shmi: Chi Chi  
Padme/Queen Amidala: Bra  
Darth Sidious: Goku  
Darth Maul: Freeza  
Jar Jar Binks: Piccolo  
Boss Nass: Dende  
Watto: also Dende  
Nute Gunray: Cell

On the deck of a trede federation vessel...

"Master, I have a bad feeling about this," Gohan said.

"Don't worry kid!" Hercule said with a laugh. "How could you be worried when you're with the man who defeated Cell !"

"How could they have stuck me with this idiot," Gohan thought to himself, "and even jedi usually have better hair cuts then him."

On the bridge...

"Sir, I believe the 2 messengers are jedi," a golden three-pio unit said.

"Who cares about that," Cell said with a grimace. "How dare that worthless Satan claim to have defeated me. We must inform the supremely evil one of these new developments."  
"Suddenly, the image of a powerful looking, yet even more evil than powerful, hooded being popped out of a little box upon the table. "With a sudden movement that sent fear into Cell's heart, the dark lord removed his hood, to reveal the supremely evil and ingeneous... Son Goku!

"Hey, um Cell, where'd that other guy that was with with you go?" Goku asked, clueless as usual.

"He was annoying me with his whining, so I destroyed him," Cell replied with a shrug.

"Oh well that's cool, but I just called to tell you to like go kill some jedi and stuff, so um see ya soon," Goku said, signing off.

One of the droids came up to Cell and said, "Master, we have dispatched a squad of droids to kill the jedi. They will not escape us."

back in the jedi's chamber...

"Master! We're under attack!" Gohan yelled, to wake Hercule up. "I know my young, weak, inexperienced and pitiful padawan. Let us battle them!"

As soon as Hercule Satan saw that they carried guns, his disposition changed, so that Gohan was forced to face the droids alone. As Mr. Satan hid behind the door, Gohan raised his hand and yelled Kame-Ha-Me-Ha, destroying all the droids with a blast.

Suddenly cocky and confident once again, Mr. Satan yelled, "Come Gohan, we must attack the bridge."

As Gohan and the world champ approached the conference room, Gohan prepared to blast the command center's door open, Hercule suddenly grabbed his arm saying, "No padawan! You're not strong enough! Only my powers are sufficient to destroy this minor obstacle. Go and attempt to hold off the droidekas."

As Mr. Satan was preparing his most powerful Satan Punch, Gohan was easily picking off the droidekas as they came with tiny blasts from his fingers. Suddenly, with an immensly powerful blow, Mr. Satan attempted to destroy the blast door.

"Ah! My hand!" Mr. Satan yelled in pain. After a few moments of whining on the floor, Mr. Satan finally noticed that people that people were watching. Suddenly straightening, Mr. Satan grabbed his demi sayajin apprentice, saying calmly, "Padawan, these forces are to great for us. We must flee," he said oblivious to the fact that every droid had easily been destroyed by a few blasts from Gohan.

at a contract negotiations table

"I refuse to say that!" Piccolo said.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Piccolo, but there are no exceptions. You must say every line in the script," George Lucas said, trying to be as reasonable as possible. "And what's so bad about saying O you are far greater than I could ever be Master Hercule. I plead for you to accept me as your humble servant."

"Fine. I'll say it, as long as I can blow up that script writer over there."

"Done," George Lucas said as Piccolo ki blasted the writer into the next dimension.

In the Jungles of Naboo...

Mr. Satan was fleeing the battle droids as fast as he could with his apprentice, though Gohan didn't really know why they were running from such weak robots. Suddenly, Mr. Satan tripped over a branch, knocking over a 7ft. tall, green man, just as a huge transport flew overhead, nearly running the 2 down. 

With a shiver, Piccolo turned to Mr. Satan, saying, "You have saved my life. O, you are far greater than I could ever be Master Hercule. I plead for you to accept me as your humble servant.

Hercule suddenly considered the Namekian. "Normally I wouldn't accept someone as weak as you, but today I choose to pity you and will accept your unquestionig servitude to me the greatest warrior to ever live," Mr Satn said with an arrogant smirk that Piccolo so wanted to wipe off his ugly face. "Tell me, servant guy, where can we go to escape pursuit."

"If you prefer, oh great master, I can instead destroy the droids," the Namekian warrior grumbled, glaring daggers at Mr. Satan.

"No! The odds are against us, we must flee!" Mr. Satan yelled.

"Fine follow me to the great Otoh Gunga," Piccolo said as he led the 2 jedi towards his home. 

If you liked this story, I'll continue it, but not until I get at least 5 reviews. I don't want to waste time writing a story noone likes. 


	2. Star Wars Episode 1: Part 2

Disclaimer: I donÕt own much of any and youÕd have to be pretty stupid to think I do because than IÕd be a multi-millionaire.  
  
  
  
Episode 1: part 2  
  
  
ÒWe have now arrived at Otoh Gunga,Ó Piccolo declared gruffly.   
  
ÒSo Piccolo, yousa being returned once again,Ó A weak Gungan soldier said, as he approached the Namekian. ÒYousa being in big doodoo dis time Piccolo. We be taking you te see Boss Dende.Ó With that all the guards took out their electropoles and started jabbing the warrior.   
  
Though ultimately the little electric shocks didnÕt work very well on Piccolo, he disliked the appearance of being manhandled, so he broke all the staffs into 8 pieces with a burst of telekinesis and proceeded to ask the startled soldiers, ÒWhy is it that you slur all your !?! It is really annoying me, so youÕd best stop doing it or else youÕll find yourself blasted into the next dimension!Ó  
  
ÒSorry dude,Ó one of the soldiers said, Òbut George Lucas says that we have to talk like that or else the fanÕs will decide that were not alien enough.  
  
ÒDamn!Ó Piccolo cursed. ÒWell I guess we should go see Dende now.Ó   
  
ÒSilence, you weakling servant guy!Ó Hercule commanded. ÒI make the decisions around here. I say we should go teach that fool Boss Dende why you donÕt mess with jedi master Hercule, or his pitiful servants, Gohan and Piccolo. Now we will go see Boss Dende.Ó  
  
ÒGohan, how do you put up with this guy on such a regular basis?Ó Piccolo asked.   
  
ÒI ignore him, but thatÕs getting really hard to do right now, so I say we just ki blast the jerk as soon as the movieÕs over.Ó  
  
ÒIÕm in,Ó Piccolo agreed with the young demi-sayajin.  
  
in the Great DendeÕs throne room...  
  
The great Hercule advanced upon Boss Dende calmy and with a sudden wave of his hand, he said powerfully, ÒYou will give us transport to Naboo.Ó  
  
ÒNo I wonÕt,Ó Dende replied.  
  
ÒDamnit!Ó Hercule cursed ÒThat always worked for Qui-Gon Jinn. Fine then IÕll have to try my second plan. Please, please provide us with transport for myself and my 2 servants.Ó  
  
ÒOne moment, master,Ó Piccolo cut in, saying the last part dripping with sarcasm. ÒDende, if you donÕt give us a transport, IÕll blow this whole city to shreds.Ó  
  
ÒFine, fine you win. Just leave, or else IÕll have my guards arrest you.Ó  
  
ÒJust try it,Ó Piccolo challenged.  
  
So with that they began their travel to meet with the queen of Naboo.  
  
  
in the queenÕs palace...  
  
  
A 3 year old Bra sat upon the throne. She was the youngest queen ever to be elected. Though her father had always told her not to be afraid of anything, she was struck with a horrible fear when she stared at the powerful android before her.  
  
Seeing the childÕs discomfort, Cell quickly used it to his advantage, ÒNow you will sign this treaty, or else IÕll kill you.   
  
ÒNo IÕm gonna do what Daddy always says and be brave. I am the queen and I wonÕt give in no matter what!Ó  
  
ÒFine, then I suppose itÕs time for you to die.Ó  
  
ÒOkay, okay, IÕll sign, just donÕt blast me. ItÕd mess up my clothes and then IÕd be almost as ugly as Pan.Ó  
  
Suddenly, a voice could be heard from above. It was the great Master Hercule. She was saved. ÒI will stop you Cell monster,Ó Mr. Satan said as he swung down on a vine to save Queen Bra, but unfortunately the world champ had miscalculated and missed Bra completely, instead flying facefirst into one of the palace walls. In a flash of golden light Master HerculeÕs apprentice, Gohan, went mystic SSJ2 and beat the crap out of Cell, but before he could save Bra, Hercule burst in. I haved saved you, my queen. We must swiftly get to the ship, before reinforcements arrive.Ó Gesturing to Gohan and Piccolo, he said, ÒCome weaklings, before I am forced to save you once again.Ó  
  
Rolling their eyes, the 2 Z fighters followed their supposed saviour to the ship, hoping they could escape the blockade.  
  
  
  
  
Well what did you think of that chapter? I want your opinions as to whether I should let Vegeta blow up Sebulba during the pod race, blow up the whole pod racing stadium, or whether he should just send the whole planet to hell. IÕd like your opinions, so just e-mail me at kami@pop.gto.net, or post a review with your opinion in it. As always, I request that you post a review and reccomend that you read another story of mine, Mr. SatanÕs Magical Adventure. I think itÕs pretty funny. 


	3. Star Wars Episode 1: Part 3

Star Wars DBZ Style  
  
  
Vegeta: Ha ha ha! This is great! I get to abolish slavery!  
  
Gohan: Do you think you can really do it on your own?  
  
Vegeta: Of course I can brat of Kakkarot. All I have to do is blow up the planet and slavery will cease to exist on Tatooine.   
  
Gohan: But what about your friends?  
  
Vegeta: Those bakas arenÕt my friends. They said I was short.   
  
Gohan: Well they are right.  
  
Vegeta preparing a powerful Final Flash: So much for this planet. Hahahahaha!  
  
Disclaimer: I... donÕt... own... D... B... Z. Damn! That was harder than I expected.  
  
  
Star Wars Episode 1: Part 3  
  
  
  
ÒMaster Satan! We cannot get through the blockade. TheyÕve taken out the shield generator. We need to send out the astromechs to save us.  
  
ÒHey Goten,Ó Trunks said curiously.  
  
ÒYeah Trunks,Ó Goten replied, clueless as usual.  
  
ÒWhy donÕt we go see what all the droids are doing?Ó  
  
ÒBut Trunks, Mr. Lucas said that we couldnÕt be in it till the Jedis go to Coruscant.Ó  
  
ÒCome on Goten! Are you gonna let some baka human order us around !?! LetÕs go find a trash can to put on so we can be a droid too!Ó  
  
ÒBut Trunks, what are we gonna call ourselves?Ó  
  
ÒUm... Well letÕs worry about that later Goten. For now letÕs just follow those droids.  
  
As the 2 demi-sayajins reached the top of the ship, they noticed that all the other droids, except for an extremly dedicated droid called Artoo D2, had been blown away by droid fighters, but when they saw the dozens of enemies approaching they simultaeneously yelled, ÒYes! Target practice!Ó But before the 2 demi-sayajins could open fire upon their enemies, the little droid beside them beeped that it had fixed the generator. Seriously annoyed, the young Prince of the Sayajins blasted away the shield generator and with the shields out of the way, began firing on the droids happily along with his friend Goten.  
  
  
back in the shipÕs control room...  
  
  
ÒSir! That little droid got the shields up!Ó  
  
ÒYay!Ó everyone celebrated.  
  
ÒWait, no. Their down again. Some other droid blew the whole generator up.Ó  
  
ÒDarn it!Ó Master Satan yelled. ÒWithout those shields, weÕre helpless!Ó  
  
5 minutes later there wasnÕt a single droid fighter left and the ship went to hyperspace, as a simple astromech had somehow decimated the entire federation battle fleet! Unfortunately, the little droid had also destroyed the shields and destroyed one of the fuel tanks that fed the hyperdrive, so they were stopping on an out of the way planet called Tattooine. But before they arrived, Queen Bra was going to congratulate the little droid, that had blasted away all the fighters, for saving them.  
  
ÒWhat is itÕs designation, Captain,Ó the 3 year old monarch said in a commanding tone, atleast for a cute little toddler.  
  
Staring confusedly at the strangely constructed droid he noticed a big sticker on the top of the droid. ÒIt appears to be called Em-tee onTues.Ó   
  
ÒWell congratulations Em-tee onTues,Ó the young queen said as she planted a large kiss on the front of the the droid. Suddenly a disgusted voice could be heard from within the droid.  
  
ÒEww Trunks, your sister kissed me.Ó   
  
Then another joined it within the droid. ÒShut up Goten, or theyÕll figure out itÕs us.Ó  
  
ÒOh my Kami!Ó Mr. Satan yelled in surprise. ÒThat droid has eaten the great jedi masters Goten and Trunks, heads of the jedi council. ÒWe must save them, or else the incredibly evil Darth Goku will rule the galaxy forever. Here! With my incredible strength, I shall free the great masters Goten and Trunks. Do not worry masters! I and my pitifully weak apprentice Gohan will you save you!Ó  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
So what did you think? As far as Episode 2 goes, I probably wonÕt do it until this ones done and I know these updates are taking along time, but IÕm also doing major work on 2 other great fics IÕm writing: Chaos and HERCULEan Days. If you havenÕt read them, you should. My reviewers have had nothing but good things to say about them. Well see you when I next update. 


	4. Star Wars Episode 1: Part 4

Star Wars DBZ Style  
  
  
Veggie-chan: Damn author! That's not my name and why am I playing the innocent little child! I demanded to be the most evil character, not a pitiful little wimp like Anakin!  
  
George Lucas: Calm down Veggie-chan.  
  
Veggie-chan: Shut up!!!!!!!!  
  
George Lucas: We did exactly as you requested. It's just that Annie's evil is hidden, but if you don't like your role then we can always make you Darth Tyrannus in the next film, but of course then you'd have to serve Goku of course.  
  
Veggie-chan: I will not serve that damn fool Kakkarot!  
  
George Lucas oblivious of the change of Veggie's hair to gold and the large ki ball forming in his hand: Fine then. It's settled. Veggie-chan has decided that Annie is the best role for him.  
  
5 minutes later George Lucas is wandering towards King Yemma's check-in station wondering: Did I say something wrong?  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: Veggie has promised to take over DBZ for me if I stop calling him that, but until he does I don't own DBZ.  
  
  
  
  
Star Wars Episode 1: part 4  
  
  
  
"Master Goku," Cell began hesitantly, recalling the Super Sayajin's incredible, evil powers, "It appears that the queen has escaped."  
  
"Just a second Cell. I'm busy. "As Darth Goku's hologram popped up it became obvious exactly what he was busy with. "Mmmmmm. This food's almost as good as Chi Chi's cooking, but um what were you saying Cell?"  
  
"The princess has escaped our blockade my lord before signing the treaty. Without it our occupation will be ended swiftly."  
  
"Oh ya that's pretty bad and did you say she has treats with her?"  
  
"No lord Goku. I said that she had yet to sign the treaty."  
  
"Oh. I guess I'll send my apprentice, Darth Freeza to stop them."  
  
"But my lord, even your apprentice may have insufficient power to overwhelm the great Hercule. His powers are impressive and even the Super Sayajin abilities of his apprentice are not to be trifled with. I should know. He's kicked my ass twice."  
  
"Did you say Super Sayajin," Freeza asked in horror. "Oh no, not again, I'm to young to die!" Freeza screeched like a little school girl, as he ran around in circles and gizzed all over his new cloak.  
  
"Okay," Goku thought to himself. Time to get a new apprentice and with his formidable force powers he convinced George Lucas to get a new actor, Darth Videl. She was by far the most evil and grosteque being they could possibly imagine and most of all had a death glare that made even Darth Goku shiver. She was perfect!  
  
  
  
  
Tatooine...  
  
"You can't take her Royal Highness here! The Hutts are gangsters and led by their new master Sharpner the Slut they're more dangerous then ever."  
  
"Oh just shut up," Gohan said, blasting former Captain Panaka straight to King Yemma.  
  
Suddenly a small blue-haired figure ran towards the 2 jedi. "I'm coming with you."  
  
"No Bra, you must stay in the ship."  
  
"Don't be silly Gohan, that can't possibly be Bra. The queen has fancy robes and stuff. You're not the queen, right?"  
  
"Um... of course not! I'm Padme Bramidala."  
  
"See my young apprentice. Appearances can be decieving. You must learn not to fall for tricks like me, or else you'll end up believing something stupid like that those gold haired guys beat Cell.  
  
  
in Dende's used, busted and broken parts shop  
  
  
"We're looking for some gas for our hyperdive," Master Satan spoke up.  
  
"Fine. That will be 10 trillion senzu dollars."  
  
"I have 100 trillion Hercule dollars."  
  
"Hercule dollars no good, so get the hell out of my shop!"  
  
"Hey, what are you doing here Daddy?" Bra asked curiously.  
  
"I, Vegeta, Prince of the Sayajins, along with my mother, the banshee woman, have been enslaved by Dende and now must serve his every whim."  
  
"Vegeta! Polish my boots!" Dende yelled.  
  
"I, Vegeta, will never do such a thing!"  
  
"Fine then. No food for a week."  
  
"Grr," Vegeta growled as he found himself polishing his master's boots.  
  
"I beg you oh great Master Satan who is far greater then a weakling like me could ever be,-I am going to kill whoever wrote this script- to free me from my cruel bondage so I can perhaps become as incredibly powerful as you are."  
  
  
  
  
  
That's it! So was it okay? If you like Vegeta, or Freeza sorry for bashing them, but that's what this fic is all about and if anyone actually likes Hercule, as if such a thing could exist, sorry for bashing him all throughout this fic. 


	5. Star Wars Episode 1: Part 5

Star Wars DBZ Style  
  
  
No author notes. Sorry, but every attoounce of creativity has leaked out of my brain.  
  
  
Disclaimer: No creativity so I'll just say that I don't own DBZ and that I have a wish for the eternal dragon.  
  
  
Eternal Dragon: What is your wish?  
  
Kami: I wish that Veggie-chan was even weaker than Sharpner.  
  
Eternal Dragon: I'm sorry, but that is not possible. Sharpner has a power level of negative infinity therefore Vegeta cannot be made weaker than him. What is your next wish?  
  
Veggie-chan: Now you will die for trying to make me as weak as some baka human. Die you pitiful Namek! Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha...etc...etc...  
  
Kami: Damnit! I really wish Vegeta would just shut up!  
  
Eternal Dragon: Your wish is granted. See ya! I'm going to Hawaii!   
  
Kami laughing at Vegeta's inability to speak: Hahahahahahahahahahahaha! I just love accidently being evil!  
  
  
  
  
Star Wars Episode 1: part 5  
  
  
  
"I Hercule will now save you Vegeta. I know that your insignificant strength will never be able to match mine, but I will still be nice and take you to the Jedi Temple for judgement. Now I, Master Satan, will use my incredible, manly power to free you from your cruel bondage and-"  
  
"Do you never shut up! I don't care what the script says! I say that it's about time I send this planet on a 1 way trip to the next dimension! As the great jedi and the weakly child Vegeta ran to the ship Vegeta raised 2 fingers and made good on his promise though Sharpner the Slut was not to happy about it.  
  
  
  
In Sharpner the Slut's palace...  
  
  
"What do you mean the whole planet's going to explode! I haven't finished watching this Videl look alike dance for me! To bad I can't ever manage to get the real thing."  
  
  
On Coruscant...  
  
  
"Hey I've seen you before! You're the supremely evil Darth Goku!" Bra screeched, seeing the senator of her sovreign planet.  
  
"Do you mean He Who Must Not Be Named!" Hermione screeched!  
  
"Shut up!" Gohan snapped. "You're not even in this fanfic!" and with that he sent her to the next dimension.  
  
"Uh... no I'm not! Why would you think that? I am not Darth Goku, but Senator Goku! How could you ever mistake me for the supremely evil one. Our names don't even sound alike!  
  
Everyone sweatdrops   
  
"Actually dad, Darth Goku and Senator Goku do sort of sound alike."  
  
"Be silent my young apprentice," Master Hercule said as he walked onto the scene. "Your wisdom is not sufficient to comprehend the complexity of this situation. The only possible explanation is that Darth Goku and Senator Goku are twin brothers. One is evil and one is good. What other explanation could there possibly be !?!"  
  
Everyone, even the Hercule fanatics (a.k.a. 99.9% of the DBZ world) sweatdrop.  
  
"I propose that we do the only intelligent thing and propose a vote of no confidence so that Senator Goku may begin undoing his twin's evil plans!"  
  
"Uh...yah...sure... I'll get right on it Master Satan."  
  
Goku with an evil glint in his eye: Muwhahahahahah!!!!!!! (lol can you even imagine Goku with an evil glint in his eye or laughing evily)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Next time: Vegeta comes before the Jedi Council. What mayhem awaits?  
  
  
  
  
please R&R 


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